Amy has an eight-year-old daughter and has been parenting alone since her daughter was seven weeks old. “Her dad is not a part of her life. But we don’t dwell on it. I just get double the love and double the hugs,” Amy says, sitting next to her sweet little girl, with her warm smile and bubbly personality shining through.
Although she loves spending time with her daughter, Amy says being a single parent 100% of the time is difficult sometimes. “There just never seems to be enough time.” She says, “My mom and friends will help when I need a babysitter but I try not to ask for help too much, which is probably a downfall of mine because I’m not very good at asking for help. I don’t want to be a burden on anyone.”
“Another challenge I face is that since I’m doing this alone, all the decisions about her life fall on me,” Amy says. “I just don’t want to mess it up.” She says she feels pressure to play both the mother and the father role. She says she’s learning to depend more on God. “Being a single parent has made my walk with God stronger,” she says. “When I’m weak and struggling, God’s there for me and gives me strength.”
Amy just completed Dave Ramsey’s Financial Peace and is excited about their future. “A one income family is challenging. But, I’m really trying to buckle down and get out of debt over the next two and a half years so we can buy a house!”
Amy says one of the joys she has are the friends she’s made. “I’ve made some great friends. I love my Wednesday night Single Moms Group. The group’s getting bigger so that’s exciting to watch. I’ve been there pretty much since the beginning, and it’s awesome to see so many new single moms coming.”
The best advice she could give other single parents is to, “Find me time every day. Even if it’s just a little tiny bit. Sometimes I splurge after she goes to bed and catch up on a show I haven’t seen or read and have some relaxation time.” She says, “I know when my fuel tank isn’t full, then I’m more irritable and less patient with my daughter. When my tank is full, I’m a better mom. I’m still working on this one. I don’t get it done every day but I try.”
She goes on to say, “Give yourself grace. You’re going to make mistakes, none of us are perfect. Kids don’t come with a rule book or an owner’s manual. God gives us grace, and we just need to learn to be kinder to ourselves. I know I need to stop the negative self-talk and be kinder to myself.”
When she thinks of Single Parent Provision, Amy thinks of, “The opportunities they have for me – like Break Time. Oh my gosh, I love Break Time! Can I do a happy dance?!” Amy says her daughter also loves it, “She can’t wait to go. It’s just wonderful.” She likes that the opportunities are for both single moms and single dads.
Amy says, “Then of course, it’s the Christmas Dinner. That’s my favorite night of the year. I missed it this last year and was so sad. I look forward to it each year. Everyone makes you feel so special and loved on. I just love it.”
Thank you Amy for sharing your story and your sparkling personality!
Published February 2019