Like most single parents, Megan did not set out to become one, but when her short-term plans did not work out like she imagined, she found herself making a decision she never thought she would. "My original plan was to foster teenage girls that needed a place to be. I had space in my home and my heart for them and felt like this would be something I could do while I waited for the rest of my life to take shape." Megan decided to get licensed to foster but had intentions for her involvement to be temporary.
Megan got the call for her first placement shortly after getting her license but was surprised to find that it wasn't for a teenager, but a 10-month old girl named Bella. They told her that Bella needed to be in a house with only a female caretaker, and they were hoping that she would be willing to take her in. Megan realized with these parameters, Bella may not have too many options available for her, so she said yes.
After being together for a few years, it became clear that Bella's biological mom would not be able to take her back into her home. Megan realized that what had started as something she could do in the short-term transition of her life, was now turning into her reality. "It's all I have known. Most people don't set out to be a single parent, but I am a single mom by choice." Megan officially adopted Bella in 2019 and they couldn't be happier.
Megan's greatest joys are watching Bella learn and grow. She enjoys watching her personality shine as she is learning to express herself and become more independent as she gets older. "The things that were a struggle for her are not a struggle anymore. It's the little things that she does that are super fun. She is a good reminder to keep life simple."
Life as a single mom also comes with challenges. "The hardest part is really the decision making. When you don't have someone to bounce ideas off of you wonder if you are making the right decisions, especially right now with the coronavirus and starting school. Every decision has to be made on my own."
Megan would like other single parents to know that you have to live your life on your own standards and not get caught up in the comparison game. "Whether you put your kids to bed at 7:00 or it's better for you to wait until 9:00, for example, we all have different shortcuts we have to take and as long as your kids are happy, healthy, and taken care of, then our differences aren't good or bad; it's just what you are okay with."
Megan knows that having a good support system is huge when parenting alone, which is why she is grateful for Single Parent Provision. She has been a part of one of SPP's Moms Groups for awhile now and is always encouraged by the single moms that she meets. "We are all at different stages of life and have become single parents in different ways, but it is so nice to be around people that understand and get where you are coming from." Megan also attributes her SPP Moms Group for getting her back to church. "I didn't think I had a spot in church. I was in my 30s, not divorced but single with a child, and I just felt like I didn't fit in to any one particular group. But this group showed me that I do fit in."
Whether they are redecorating her room or playing at the park, life is full of fun surprises for Megan and Bella, and we are so happy to have them be a part of the Single Parent Provision community!
Thank you for sharing your story with us, Megan!
Published August 2020