Mattie has made a commitment to lead her life and her family of three young children with intentionality. Whether that is by setting time aside for Bible reading, parenting with a long-term perspective, or setting aside time to play, she is deliberate in the choices she makes.
Mattie came to this place of intentionality after extreme events in her marriage took place. She was married for five and a half years and pregnant with their third child when she says she knew it was no longer physically safe for her to be there. “My parents let me stay with them which has given me a chance to heal and the kids the stability that they needed.”
Mattie found healing through counseling, Divorce Care classes, and praying while listening to worship music. “It can be easy to slip into an ‘Okay, I’m healed more so I can relax now’ and let go of the work part of healing. But I didn’t want to zone out. I wanted to be intentional about what I would do.” Even though it would have been easy to walk away at the time, Mattie decided to continue going to church and stay involved with Bible studies. During her marriage, Mattie shared feeling belittled about how she understood her relationship with God, “now I see the lies and identify them for what they are. I want to continue learning more about my relationship with God and how He sees me. I want to be able to define that for myself and not let others define it for me.”
Mattie encourages other single parents to not be afraid to ask for help. “And don’t be focused on what was done to you or the kids or what is coming in the future. Be focused on the here and right now. The time with our kids is gone in a second. They won’t remember all the things and the activities, but they will remember how you made them feel. I want my kids to remember feeling secure and loved. And I want them to grow up assured in how much God loves them.”
Part of the support Mattie has found on her journey as a single parent is being a part of Single Parent Provision. “Being in a room with people that have similar journeys and to be able to just sit, talk, and understand each other without sharing the whole story is great!”
In the future, Mattie hopes to find a house of her own and put her degree to good use. She hopes one day her story will help others.
We are so glad to know you, Mattie, and be a part of your journey!
Published April 2021